


One way ticket

by Bubble_Dreamer



Category: Hazbin Hotel (Web Series)
Genre: Asexual Relationship, Demon Alastor (Hazbin Hotel), F/M, Human Alastor (Hazbin Hotel), Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Serial Killers, Stockholm Syndrome
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-25
Updated: 2020-08-25
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:55:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 19,195
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26105305
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bubble_Dreamer/pseuds/Bubble_Dreamer
Summary: Young, ambitious, outstanding in society of late 1920s, you found yourself able to achieve anything you desire. Change the world around you to make it a better place. All you need is a keen ear to hear you out. But life not always goes according to the plans, playing tricks and pulling cruel jokes. You were first to learn that… the hard way.
Relationships: Alastor (Hazbin Hotel)/Reader
Comments: 14
Kudos: 90





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Hello! This is my first story here, and first ever using reader character so I hope I didn't turn more into OC! I tried to make the reader as neutral as possible (apart from being female, sorry, it fits to the concept, timeline and all) however she shares some quirks with Alastor even if both of them seem not to notice that as anything peculiar. She also doesn’t like to be touched, however usually doesn’t react as severe or threatening as him, she simply feels that her personal space was invaded, which make her feel anxious and uncomfortable. As for her romantic approach, she doesn’t have to be asexual, more like she has intimacy issues, and a mere mention of commitment or said intimate contacts makes her skin crawl.

The year 1928. Quite unrestful times yet you were optimistic. You just graduated which was quite a feat for a woman. Cruel times. Moreover your professor was so delighted with your intellect and the thesis you presented, that he insisted on sharing your ideals in local paper. You were a timid person, or at least you were told to be one by your parents, by society, so the article with your name on it was just a peak of success for you. You couldn’t been anymore wrong, as one day you got a phone call from New Orleans, made by local radio! You were told that the article, which somehow reached so far south, captivated the host of everyday’s broadcast and he expressed the will to interview you live! You couldn’t contain yourself.  


So there you were, travelling south, nearly bouncing with excitement. It was quite a journey yet you insisted on going alone, you were an independent woman and if you could handle university and publicity of your thesis ideas, you could also get from A to B without problems. Also, a cruel truth was, that there was not really anyone willing to go with you so far. Your parents were very busy people, trying to earn their wage every single day. Everyone smelled a crisis in the air and the general mood was rather gloomy. Also, even if you were an open and friendly person, for the last few years you were so focused on your development that you didn’t have any close friends. The same went for your love life, but that could be a result of some deeper issues you were yet to find.  


Your journey finished in the evening and the lights, smells and sounds of the city took your breath away. This place certainly had its own atmosphere! But sightseeing was not on your plate as you were occupied with looking for a place to stay. You already knew where the hotels were located as you analyzed the map on the train. Better be safe than sorry! Nevertheless, you found the right place to stay at the first attempt and, even if the hour was fairly early, you decided to head to the bed. The travel was tiring and tomorrow was the day of the broadcast and the mere thought made your stomach tighten in stress. Unsurprisingly, you couldn’t fall asleep.  


The next day you woke up early, as predicted. Stressful events worked like a biological alarm clock for you. Preparing yourself, you put on your best dress in your possession, 1920s styled, maybe a little plain but tailored especially for you. The material also was your favorite color and was very light, perfect for the southern climate. Putting on a hat and taking your purse in hand you braced yourself and left the hotel, heading straight to get some breakfast and then…  


Before you realized you stood in front of a front door of the radio station. You readjusted your dress and hat once more, took a deep breath and your finger travelled to the buzz bell. After a moment the door opened and a chubby man greeted you with a kind smile on his lips. You immediately stated your purpose and his eyes shone in recollection. He invited you inside and led the way.  


The radio station was a narrow, two-story building. On the ground floor there was a secretariat and something akin to a waiting room with sanitary space, while the first floor was completely devoted broadcasting areas. You thought you would be seated in the waiting room for a time being, as you were distinctively earlier, but the short man led you upstairs immediately, to your slight horror. He knocked on one of the door, but not before peeking inside through the glass part of the said door. Immediately, a muffled voice called you inside and with a short word of introduction you were literally pushed inside. You stood awkwardly in the middle of the doorway as a man with glasses, that were placed low on his nose, turned his attention to you.  


He looked like a man in early thirties, elegantly clothed, with a certain spark in the gaze. He was rather well positioned in the radio as people turned to him, in friendly, but still respectful manner. He himself was a perfect picture of the radio host indeed. There was no sign of nervousness or uncertainty while meeting a new person. He openly welcomed you with a loud and well-practiced voice tone. You wouldn’t lie, his confidence made you slightly nervous. It was his territory, you were new here and unexperienced. Even though he seemed to be nice and helpful, who knew what was brewing in his mind. It was your bad habit, the one born from the field of your studies. You liked overanalyzing a human mind.  


He immediately introduced himself and you felt the urge to exchange this pleasantries. You noticed that he was constantly smiling, yet upon hearing your name his smile widened a fraction. He also eyed you up and down quite openly. The chubby man left you with simple ‘good luck’ and you two stood there eyeing each other. He seemed to shake himself out of his stupor and proposed you a seat in front of him, in front of set of microphones and different devices looking alien to you. To calm your nerves you started to do what you liked very much, asking questions.  
He openly and patiently answered all of them. They mainly concerned the way that radio operated, how the broadcasts worked and all other details you were curious about. You both talked for a quite some time, until Alastor indicated that it was time to start.  


“What do I do?”  


“Just be yourself, my darling! Don’t mind the audience! The stage is all yours!” he exclaimed and then started to push some buttons on the console before him. He put the headphones on his head and motioned for you to do the same. You obliged while he said a word of an introduction to his listeners. Then he turned to you.  


“Now! Won't you introduce yourself to other residents of the south, the loyal listeners of my everyday entertainment broadcast?”  


“Oh, I’m sorry… I am not entirely sure what to say. I guess I’m just merely nervous…”  


“Don’t you worry, darling, imagine there is only the two of us in here~!”  


“Oh that I will…” you answered immediately but your mind betrayed you and was blank immediately after. “So, I’d say… welcome everyone, I’m Y/n and I came from far away to your wonderful city to share with you my, probably unusual and unhealthy, interest. So thank you very much for this. It means a lot to me.” You said and your eyes widened in disbelief at amused smirk of your host, that was sitting across from you. He was totally relaxed.  


“Very well, darling, you are natural, but let’s repeat that. Let us turn on the microphones first.~”  


“They were turned off?!” you mouthed in shock.  


“Actually…no, they are on. I was joking, HA HA HA.” You paled realizing something. He was there to _destroy_ you.  


“So… are we on air now or not?” was it some joke pulled on you? Your slightly insecure mind screamed at you, reminding you that you were a woman once for all. There were thin chances that any radio would be interested in a serious matter you were there to present, nevertheless, presented by the woman from far away.  


“Does it matter?” now you were confused and slightly angry at his laidback answer. So it meant that they pulled you to New Orleans just to make some laugh out of you. They never wanted to broadcast your opinions and you just let them to lure you there.  


“No, I guess not. I’m here to answer your questions and tell you about ideals I worked on. So as long as you will be satisfied I will be as well.” You answered honestly, completely pushing the thought of possible live broadcast aside. You just wanted to save yourself and your already wounded pride.  


“Wonderful!” he exclaimed. “So why don’t you share what you worked on so hard? I believe it was your thesis, right?”  


“Yes, indeed. I studied psychology, as a human mind is very poorly evaluated and known. There are plenty of mysteries hidden in our skulls, mister Alastor. Moreover, I would love to help people in need, and there are many misconceptions of healing patients with mental impairments in institutions called asylums. The times changed, it is also the time to change the way that those people are treated!” now you started to get passionate. “What I came for today is to tell you about my thesis which I devoted to a certain group of people with mental …. difficulties.”  


“And they are?” he asked with smile showing his teeth.  


“….Serial killers.” You answered after moment of a hesitation. You were twiddling your thumbs at that point.  


“Very interesting pick… controversial, I must add…”  


“Yes, it is. I know that many people would just laugh in my face for even trying, but the truth is, I don’t believe that a person of perfect mental health is able to commit a crime as big as a murder is, just because. Multiple times. There always is a reason.”  


“Of what sorts, darling?”  


“Various. Well, you can compare them to thieves for example. Usually someone start to steal because they are in serious need, without means of living. After some time they may get better, and it is only then, when some of them start to convert their initial reasons of stealing into the greed. Even if they don’t need to anymore, they still steal because that greed orders them to gain more and more.” You finished but realizing that you might have rambled too much, losing your initial meaning completely, you hurriedly added: “But initially they stole because they had to.”  


“You want to say that a killer kills because he has to?”  


“Not necessarily. I mean they kill because they want to gain something out of it. Usually it is a joy.” You held up your voice. “But why a perfectly normal person would need to look for a joy in a murder? Because they are not ‘normal’ many would say. But I say that they are _troubled_ , instead. I do believe that somewhere during their lives there must have happened something that made them unable to feel joy or other ‘humane’ emotions through typical activities. So they reach farther and farther until they find it. Usually in a macabre I’m afraid. But this thesis is nothing new, it was actually confirmed by people much more experienced in psychoanalysis and such than I. All I did was making this statements to be more approachable for wider masses. I want people to know. “  


“Do you know why I specifically invited you to New Orleans?” he asked and you could smell a trick in it. “You may be unaware but actually we DO have one of them, serial killers, here, murders ongoing.”  


“Pardon?” you blinked at his interjection. You didn’t know that, how was that possible you overlooked that detail?  


“What would you tell all those families that just lost someone to that maniac? Would you try to rationalize his deeds? Would you say, he’s innocent to the faces of those unfortunate folk?” he didn’t give you any time to answer as he leaned closer to you even if there was a good space between you two. “What would you tell him, if he listened to our talk just right now?”  


" _He? Innocent?_ It is a wacky nonsense, mister Alastor.” You replied and his smug smirk got smaller. You also noticed that he assumed the murderer was a man, but it was actually common to diminish women in generally everything. “They are not innocent by any means. All I can say is that I cannot imagine the loss those families experienced, and I’m sorry. All I could do, is to pray for the souls of the victims, hoping that they are indeed in better place now.” You pursed your lips in concentration “As for my research and thesis, it states only that there is always a reason behind this outrageous behavior, what is done is done. If they killed, they committed the sin, there is no turning back.” You declared without stutter, your tone became more firm. “However, looking into the reason behind it, it can make it easier to understand and prevent in the future…. To simply catch such people, help them. Before they hurt anybody.”  


The interview lasted for almost an hour, however, it felt good to speak freely about a passion, so the time filed by surprisingly fast. At the end Alastor grinned widely, like a shark, and you frowned, readying yourself for the next heavy question, which apparently he loved. Instead, he lifted the microphone closer to his mouth.  


“That would be all my dear listeners! I hope that our immensely captivating conversation with dear Y/n reached deepest parts of your minds. Enough to inspire you to look for your more humane behaviors!~ We will be back after a short musical interlude, meanwhile keep yourself save and stay tuned for the rest of entertainment we have in store for you~!” he exclaimed glancing towards you, who sat in a mild disbelief. He pushed some buttons and took off his headphones with a knowing smirk.  


“What? You thought I wasn’t broadcasting our talk? HA HA HA”  


“Well… Actually I wasn’t sure…” you mumbled. “I… I was live?!” when realization hit you, you felt as all muscles in your body tensed.  


“Oh, very much so!~But as I said, you are natural, so WELL DONE!”  


“Thank you… In the end I was not nervous at all. So thank you for that as well.” He nodded in acknowledgement, letting his grin widen. “Actually, what you used back then was an example of a great manipulation. I didn’t realize earlier.” You smiled at him.  


“A manipulation? Oh, nononono, I would never manipulate such a belle!” he said with a wink towards you and you felt your face getting hotter by any second. You also got up and he motioned for you to follow him, leaving the studio. “By the way….You are not married, are you?” Scratch that, now all the blood left your face!  


"Married? Oh no, no I am not.” You hastily declared.  


“Boyfriend?” he casually asked again, going side by side with you, leading you downstairs.  


“Uh…. No? Why do you ask me that?” narrowing your eyes in suspicion, yet still keeping up your awkward smile, you asked.  


“In this case I insist on a dinner!” the radio host clapped his hands in delight and approached you, grasping both your hands. “Due to my hectic schedule and amount of work I cannot even share a cup of coffee with you right now, and that is at least unseeingly! Tomorrow night sounds good?”  


“Uh…?... why…?” you slapped yourself internally, hard and multiple times. What kind of answer was that? Why must you be so rude?!  


„Oh, darling, you are incredibly captivating individual and my curiosity is simply not satisfied with our lovely talk, limited by a timeline of the broadcast.” He complained with a dramatic flair, seemingly ignoring your lack of enthusiasm “Yet, it is not my intention to make you feel uncomfortable in any way!~” he said knowingly and you couldn’t help but feel exposed somehow. Did he analyze you and your behaviors during the interview to know what makes you uncomfortable? “I would be also delighted to be able to show you our lovely city! After all, you are new here, I want to make your trip memorable!~”  


“Oh, I assure you it already is…” you replied mildly, realizing you failed to give the answer yet. “But.. I don’t see any harm in a casual dinner night…”  


“So it is a _date_.”  


“A date, wait… I meant…”  


“I’ll collect you at six tomorrow then! Oh, I’m looking forward to-…!” at that he was interrupted by a person calling him back to the office, as the break in his broadcast was closing to over. “Oh, it seems I must go back now. Be very careful out there, as I said, we do have one of them running lose and unpunished…” he nodded to someone behind you as you shared goodbyes and left, skipping steps while running excitedly upstairs. The chubby man from earlier approached, asking how did you like your first interview and also proposed you a cup of tea, which you accepted. You needed to let go of some steam before coming back to your hotel.  


The next day he did appear on time, however, you couldn’t help but wonder how he knew where you stayed. He promptly explained that details concerning your stay were passed to him with your documents. You found it strange as you were sure the only document on you he had was the text of your thesis, which he could get to know with beforehand, but you let it go. It’s not like there was plenty of hotels in the city at the time and he could simply ask around.  


He led you down the streets you already recognized, as the whole day before your companion collected you, you let yourself to visit and sightsee. However, as the sunset began, they had completely different atmosphere. You heard street musicians playing jazz, singing and dancing on the candle lit corners. People seemed lively and happy even though most of them should be tired at that time of the day, heading home after the working shifts. And those delicious smells. All restaurants had their doors and windows opened for the customers to enjoy the fresh air while having a dinner, some of them had them outdoors. Many men with canes and top hats looked in your direction, greeting Alastor on their way. The women accompanying them shyly nodded their greetings as well, yet their eyes traveled rather to you than him. Oh, fresh rumors were on their way. He must have been very well recognized individual, indeed!  


You both also approached one of the restaurants. And, oh boy, it looked fancy. Your nervousness peaked as Alastor with a flourish movement invited you inside. You gulped down your reasonless panic and got inside, being followed by the radio host. You both were led to one of the tables, secluded enough to provide privacy, yet close to window so you still were able see what was going on outside.  


As soon as you sat down, menus were given to you and you, being an outsider had to ask your host for help in picking food. His suggestion was jambalaya as he claimed this particular receipt accompany him since his childhood and was worth trying. However, he immediately claimed that the best jambalaya ever made was his mother’s so he ordered something else for himself. The one prepared by his mother was simply to die for.  


As the food was ordered you dreaded the awkward silence between you two, but you couldn’t be any more wrong. Alastor didn’t give you a second of the silence as he immediately asked you random questions or instead rambled about everything that appeared on his mind. You felt like during the broadcast, he was hosting your meeting.  


The food arrived and you had to admit that he was right, the southern cuisine was out of this realm. The whole evening seemed to be civil, however, sometimes you couldn’t help but feel awkward and even slightly repulsed by gestures and touches you received from him.  


“Oh don’t misinterpret my advances, you see I am a hopeless romantic man, still looking for my better half. However, the task seems to be fruitless so far HA HA HA! I mean no offence to you, but tonight isn’t the night for a romance! There is so much to do, so much to see!” he said loudly and you could feel as a few eyes turned towards your table. “The excitement fills every pore of my body! Nonono, pure business, my dear!” he ranted as you sat there watching his dramatics. Nevertheless, you felt the relief somehow. But at the same time his honesty unnerved you, he himself noticed that you felt uncomfortable at times, enough to reassure you. Was it so easy to read you?  


“Well, I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable as well. I know that my behavior can be slightly outstanding, even my own parents are not happy with my doings.” You tried to appease your own conscience as you felt that you are causing this scene, once again.  


“Whatever you mean?”  


“Eh… you know women at my age are already married, having children even, and I on the other hand chose university. It wasn’t easy, there were only two other women with me, but we managed to graduate. I hoped that maybe my family could notice the efforts I put into all of this, educating myself, trying to mean something. But instead all I hear is how much they cannot wait for me to get married, because people start talking…”  


“Ah yes, it indeed is outstanding… But do you not regret it at all? Don’t you agree with them? I do believe even with your brilliant mind it would be difficult for you to cope without a man by your side. The times are hard.”  


“So even you, a _modern man_ , fall into the society standards? Thinking like the mass?” you were quite disappointed. “Well, so what would you say that I also am a hopeless romantic woman still looking for my better half. Without a success.” You were always like this. The timid and shy one in your general human interactions, yet when certain subjects were concerned you became defensive and angry.  


“I’d say it is a shame.” He simply commented and didn’t say anything more about this.  


That exchange left a bitter aftertaste on your tongue, however, it didn’t spoil the rest of the dinner. You found Alastor very good at leading conversations, he masterfully steered through topics so soon you almost forgot about any unpleasant matters. You also quite enjoyed yourself, he was charming, funny and easy to look at, so you couldn’t really complain. He had moments of what you could call a morbid sense of humor that made you feel uneasy, but overall, he seemed to be a great man. He was also a gentleman so his proposal of escorting you back to the hotel didn’t really surprise you.  


“Walk me home? Um… I don’t really want to cause out any inconveniences….” You answered his suggestion, as modest as you were taught to be.  


“Oh, but that is not a problem, rather my pleasure, Quite a pleasure!” he smiled widely extending his hand once again.  


“Alright… if it really doesn’t bother you…” you linked your glowed one and you started to head back to your hotel. However, Alastor seemed to slow down your stroll, showing you bits of the streets, telling stories about them. From time to time you stopped to listen to musicians, once he even forced you to dance with him in the crowd. As much as you felt embarrassed, seeing that the crowd move aside to make a room for you, when some other pairs joined you couldn’t help but smile to Alastor’s delight. You really had fun.  


After a while you felt as the exhaustion caught up to you and you excused yourself, calling it a night _(this time you were sure to be polite)_. You had a returning ticket for the next day and it was already late so Alastor didn’t pry anymore, agreeing with your reasoning.  


You could swear you already could recognize the area when the radio host turned towards darker part of the street where you couldn’t really see anything. Then he looked at you expectantly.  


“Would you mind a slight detour? The night is lovely and I won’t lie to you, I am unwilling to cut it so short already! Spending it in your company is a pure pleasure!”  


“Oh… you flatter me…” you blushed at his words despite yourself. “It depends on how long that detour is… I won’t lie to you as well… my feet are killing me..”  


“Oh ho ho, the fashion can be destructive indeed! But worry not I may look brittle but there is enough strength to lift and carry a human body, HA HA HA! Oh, it might have come out in an unfortunate way! But the meaning is rather literal, you can lean on me, my darling!” as he said so his hand left your elbow and travelled down just before it rested on the small of your back. You tensed and jumped aside to his surprise.  


“N-no, there is and will be no need for that!” you said hurriedly and stood in slightly defensive stance, facing him, ready to fight or flight.  


“Ah!~ there is no need to be so nervous! I didn’t mean to offend you!” he lifted his both hands in appeasing gesture and his smile got more apologetic.  


“I’m sorry… “ You frowned and felt ashamed of your reaction “this is just quite unfamiliar to me… I just am not a fan of being touched without permission or in… uh… specific areas, I know it may sound weird but I just feel so violated if that happens so your statement and… uh.. hand made me a little defensive…” you admitted still feeling your heart beat in quickened pace.  


“Ah~! I understand perfectly! It is so unnerving!” he exclaimed with a delicate shake to his head “However, that makes a lot of sense right now! Aren’t you… _troubled_ , my dear?”  


“I’m sorry, I don’t understand…” you frowned and tried to see his exact expression but it was hard in the darkness that surrounded you both.  


“Oh, don’t mind me, it is just something you said yesterday that keeps up my turmoil ever since! You said that usually _troubled people_ commit deeds that are questionable in terms of morality. As you probably count in to that elite group yourself, I wondered… what is your _sin_?” his smile turned into grin that only piqued your uneasiness.  


“I honesty cannot think of anything specific right now….” You started to back off as he made a step towards you, extending his bent arm. The tone he used seemed off, as if he taunted you, tried to catch you off guard.  


“I see, won’t we continue our detour? I didn’t mean to scare you…” he said and his tone, again, struck a certain cord in you. You started to piece all fragments of the night together, realizing something at once. The odd questions, slightly dark humor circling skillfully the theme of your thesis and current serial killings in the area.  


“No...I think you did. You meant everything.” You refused to link your arms, you were frowning while his brows lifted in appreciation? He seemed to be taken aback by your stern exclamation yet his expression was proud. “Why did you bring me here?” your eyes rolled fast to take in all your surroundings, but still not wanting to lose the sight of the man before you. To your dismay, you had to correct yourself, you didn’t recognize this place at all. There was slight tint of irritation slipping into your tone, however, the fear was the dominant one. The cryptic man tiled his head and observed you for a moment.  


“As I said, I didn’t want to cut short our time together, so I thought I could show you something that could also catch your attention! Or rather the professional interest! Follow me, please.”  


“I won’t follow you anywhere!”  


“Oh really, so you prefer to stay here alone, standing in the darkness in the unfamiliar place while there is a murderer on the run?” he taunted and extended is hand once again waiting for you. _Why did he still bring up that murderer?_ Did he really want to scare you that much? But you needed to admit, the idea of being completely alone in the complete darkness seemed frightening, even if it meant to be freed from creep’s clutches. Nevertheless, you decided to follow the strange man, however, keeping him at good distance. If anything happened, you had witnesses that you spent the evening with him.  


He walked with his back straight, head lifted up, content with himself. He led you deeper into narrow streets close to docks, or so you thought, hearing flowing water. He stood next to one of a rundown buildings and turned to you with tight smile.  


“Well, won’t you have a peek?” he gestured with a flourish movement towards a gutter running behind the rear wall of the building. You lifted a brow in question, however, he probably couldn’t see that due to the poor lightning. He put his arms being his back and started to transfer his weight from toes to heels, bouncing slightly in anticipation. Like a child that wants to show something their parents and waits impatiently to see their reaction.  


You instead gulped and still staring at him approached closer to the spot he indicated. You looked and squinted your eyes as the light was nonexistent. Only did the moon reveal itself from behind the clouds, your eyes widened and gasped in fright, regretting immediately as the stench of blood reached your throat.  


You wanted to run but your feet were heavy, backing off you stumbled until a sturdy posture stopped your fall. Two hands grasped your upper arms, keeping them close to your body and refused to let go, until you prepared yourself to scream. One of them travelled up to your mouth in lightning speed, blocking all sounds that could leave your vocal chords.  


“What do you think? What would you say about the person that had done this? What kind of trouble could they have to commit such a sin?” he was whispering to your ear like a devil, trying to build up your fear even more as he prevented you from speaking. Your answers didn’t hold any value to him. You started to claw the hand on your lips and struggle around at what he clicked his tongue “Darling, that won’t do… If you promise to keep your beautiful, radio voice down, I will let go.” He declared and immediately you nodded your head in agreement.  


“W-what is it?” you whispered hoarsely, feeling very lightheaded.  


“Why, my dear, that is a corpse! Have you never seen a murdered human? How did you support your thesis work?” he tutted and you felt puffs of air on your neck. He was so close to you, way too close. You felt sick. Your stomach churned and you thought you would throw up at any second, but surprisingly you were able to hold yourself back and tune down your reactions to at least try to keep calm.  


“Who…?”  


“I hoped you’d tell me… I am merely a radio host, man of the news, I report crimes, _don’t commit them_ …” his hands were still on you. The one hand still circling your bicep while the other hand was placed high on your shoulder, a thumb casually massaging the side of your throat. Noticing lack of any action from you he allowed himself to let you go.  


Just as his grip loosened and he gave you some room, you darted away like a mad woman. You lost your shoes, your purse, those things didn’t held any value to you at the moment. Your ears tried to catch every sound behind you, but all they managed to hear was your own heavy breath. In your panic you didn’t even thought of screaming your lungs out, you felt like the noise could indicate your position in this total darkness.  


You ran blindly, stumbling constantly and colliding with objects on your way. Turning randomly, poorly navigating through the net of alleys, your stamina started to wane. You couldn’t believe he didn’t catch you yet with the speed you were fleeing. But it seemed he was either even slower or he didn’t give you a chase at all. Which was a nonsense, you saw what he did, he showed you himself! _You felt that something was off, and still you, silly, followed him willingly!_  


You were keeping that inner battle, questioning your own intellect as you collided with something bigger than a crate. Bigger, slightly softer and much more stinky. You positively lost your balance and fell down on your bum.  


You saw a silhouette of a massive man. He was breathing heavily and overly acted as if he was mentally unwell, as much you could assume.  


“And there is a fleeing filth of this world! You tainted me as well! I shall cleanse you with my scythe on _his_ behalf!” he lifted some long object over his head and you could read the outline of a man with an axe. You started to back off on four but your limbs were sliding around because of countless puddles of mud, until your back hit the wall. _The murderer on the run_... There was no escape this time, you were doomed.  


Awaiting the fatal blow you shut your eyes, even if you didn’t really see anything due to darkness around. Your hearing registered someone’s calm steps from the side and then a curt sound of the axe hitting the ground. Your eyes opened instinctively only for you to see the bulky man, laying at your feet with a bloody puddle forming beneath him. Over him there was a silhouette of the another one, lanky and tall. The smell of particular cologne hit your nostrils and you felt the dread spreading in your body.  


“I must say that you are rather unlucky, darling….” He stepped closer to you, adjusting his bowtie and jacket “I’m sorry it took me so long but I don’t tend to chase after my prey. It took me quite some time, didn’t it? My, my look at you, all frozen in fear, disheveled and soiled with the dirt, it doesn’t suit a fine lady you are…” he tutted. “Well, unlike you, I do have some luck tonight. You were running in amok and those streets here are like a maze so I gained a little head start.” He jested as you stared ahead, at the corpse, still in your stupor.  


“Ah~ you look confounded…. You see, this was the Axeman of New Orleans… well, the following one. From time to time impersonators appear and try to carry on whatever there was done by the original one around 1919, I believe. _They caused me some troubles in the past._ ” He explained casually as you stared in disbelief at the scene before you. You wanted to ask if the carcass that you saw earlier was the job done by this ‘version’ of axeman but seeing as Alastor killed him just like that, not really sure how, you knew the answer to your own question already.  


“Well, I must say your reactions are at least amusing. Or should I say, lack of such?” he lifted the axe from the ground and, with the blunt side of the blade, he lifted your chin, so your eyes tore from the corpse and travelled up to him. “Well, it is a second corpse you saw this night, better, second murderer you met, and yet there is no teary eyed look that I expected…” he commented narrowing his eyes and observing you attentively. “Only somehow…. a lost one.” He murmured mostly to himself “As you yet prevented yourself from that pathetic begging that I usually hear and that annoys me so…Maybe I will be generous enough to present you a way out, a deal… hm? Doesn’t it sounds good?” he mused and your attention snapped back to his words. You were so petrified that all your senses felt numb. There was no trembling in your limbs, no shaky breath. You didn’t breath at all, couldn’t speak or even blink. You sat there looking miserably and as he said, lost. “I need a cover as the whole thing starts to get big, and you… well… you don’t have much of other options available…”  


“A… deal.. what deal?” you stuttered.  


“A marriage of course!” his thoughtful expression changed into an overly excited one “Oh how entertaining that must be! I’d never known, but with you!? I see myself willing to try!”  


“Is it… Are you jesting now?” _Is he serious now? Is it some kind of a cruel game, I don’t really understand?_  


„Oh, darling…. But don’t you understand that I do it for you as well? The marriage would be profitable for both of us. You will finally fulfill the social expectations and your parents will stop pestering you about this trivial matter, while I on the other hand would have my favorite toy within reach, don’t you agree?” a toy?...“Moreover, we both would not have to worry of this laughable carnal needs that other people tend to have! Our relationship will be purely platonic, if you understand what I mean, ha ha ha!” he exclaimed as if trying to sell something, presenting all its perks.  


“No, way… there is no way….” you trembled, shaking your head absentmindedly. You clammed up, feeling the pressure put to your chin by the axe's blade.  


“Should I remind your compromising position you find yourself in right now?” he took a step towards you with mischievous glint in his eyes, forcing your head up, craning your neck at very uncomfortable angle “Either way you were destined to die. By my hand or his.” He kicked carelessly a head of the man lying on the ground “You were my prey…” he growled and his smile disappeared for a second only to reappear immediately. ”However, as he is out of the game already, it leaves only both of us, isn’t it correct? I am generous enough to give you a gateway, I cannot let you go, as there would be no guarantee for me that the next day you cross my door, coppers would not knock at it!~” he exclaimed with a slight humor.  


“And what gives you an impression that I would not turn you on the first opportunity I have? If you plan to lock me somewhere you may be sure there will be people who would look for me. And they know where I went, who I supposed to meet and you are the last person I visited. There are witnesses.” The counterarguments flew out of your mouth before you could consider if it was wise to bargain at all. Surprisingly he chuckled in amusement. He must have liked your answer.  


“Oh, I could always hunt them down, that’s always an option.” You paled at his quick answer “But NO, I’m not a tyrant, I won’t close you in my basement or anything like that. I am first and foremost a gentleman.” If you could openly laugh, you would “Being my wife would place you in a very special position indeed. You would be untouchable as I would swear, as a proper husband, to protect my precious wife, however, it would also make you someone special in the eyes of authorities. My accomplice, don’t you think?” he explained everything with ease and amusement, getting so close to you that your foreheads nearly touched as he towered over you. “That is why you would not tell anybody of anything that would happen behind door of _our_ humble abode, am I right?”  


“I don’t want to partake in this madness, no…. no, you cannot force me into that…”  


“Think carefully.” He warned with a _pleasant_ smile.  


“Do I really have a choice?”  


“Hmm… I don’t think you do.” He answered with ever present smile that stretched farther, now bordering to painful grin. “And, as I said, platonic. There would be no possibility of any kind of an assault coming to you by my hand. That I can assure you of.”  


With pained expression and one more quick glance at the corpse at your feet, you decided to agree to this unreasonable deal. He threw away the axe without a care and metallic sounds of the blade hitting the ground made you cringe. Did really no one hear that? He bent down offering you his hand so you could get up, but you chose to support yourself against the wall behind you. To seal your fate, he insisted to shake hands, even if his was heavily stained with blood. Soon, after disposing of the body, which was surprisingly easy for him, he led you to his house where you both cleaned yourself and relaxed for the rest of the evening and night. Before you went to bed though he brought you to a phone and told you to call your family informing them about the happy news. You insisted to call them next day, as the call at late hour would seem to be urgent or seem unnatural, but his counter argument was equally valid as yours. One of you could change their mind till the morning comes. So in the end you obliged, hoping that your brain would cooperate and help you to appease your parents or preferably, alert them somehow so they could help you.  


“Hello? H-hi Dad… Oh the interview went great I think I didn’t make a fool of myself…” you glanced at Alastor who listened to your conversation keenly but quickly averted your gaze upon noticing his widening grin. “yeah… um… is there Mom around? No, there is no problem here, it’s just… I have some matter at hand that I would feel more comfortable to confine in her… you know like woman to woman…. Yeah, thank you…” there was a pause while you waited. When your mom picked up the speaker you could hear poorly masked worry in her voice and your dad lingering nearby, within earshot. “No, I’m fine Mom nothing happened…” _which is lie_ “I just wanted to tell you that there will be a slight change in my plans as I would stay here longer than I planned before. I happened to… meet someone…” you hung your voice in a consideration of your next words “ and I think I want to get to know him better…” you could hear the silence on the other side of the receiver and feel the tension build up by the murderer standing behind you. Before you tried to explain you heard a relieved sigh coming off from you mom and her excited voice as she hastily let you father know what was going on. She immediately expressed her joy but also worries as you found yourself far away from home.  
“Yeah I know, but I just graduated and maybe it is a good opportunity to look for a job here as well so I wouldn’t lose anything… you know me it’s difficult to me to get… interested, all of this is new to me and I’m sure that this particular kind of situation won’t happen second time, so I want to grasp the opportunity while it lasts.” You tried to say it lightly and with the air of slight humor but you weren’t sure of the final outcome “I don’t know when I’ll be back but I promise, I will update you with all news, alright? I’ll miss you too, bye…”  


“You didn’t tell them.” He stated coldly, his voice seemed very close to your head.  


“Don’t you think it would be suspicious if I, their daughter who they know very well, a person never showing interest in anybody, announced them that I plan on marrying _anybody_ after two days of being acquainted?” you explained hurriedly trying to control your trembling hands.  


“I’m so~ glad that you take it upon yourself to think about details, my darling!” all coldness dissipated from his tone and you sighed in relief for now. It was very long day, yet that night, you didn’t sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Y/N) - your name  
> (F/C) - favourite colour

The announcement of the wedding happened half of a year later. Which was still too hurried in your opinion, but you couldn’t deffer Alastor anymore as he started to lose patience. Your parents came to the south to visit you and get to know their son-in-law to be. They were not happy to know that you already lived together for some time, as you moved in to his family house a few weeks after making the deal with him, but upon meeting Alastor and making sure that there would be no social faux pas like a child on the way, they relaxed and were fairly happy for you. Especially your mother who couldn’t be any more impressed by your charming fiancé, who also was well positioned in the city you lived in. He worked in the media! He was famous and handsome, so you couldn’t hear the end of it. Your father was a little more wary but to your surprise the both men found common language faster than you expected. To be honest, you didn’t really know what you expected. Maybe that your parents would smell something fishy and would forbid the whole ordeal, or at least would not be as supportive towards the idea and in the end would somehow free you from his clutches. But instead Alastor bought them both with sweet personality and charming smiles. He was a great actor, much better than you, even if you yourself must have been not that bad. After all your own parents didn’t notice that your smiles were more forced than not.  


The ceremony was small and modest. As you were already located far from your home town, living with your husband-to-be, it was easily decided that also your wedding would take place there. Alastor seemingly didn’t have any family, so there were invited only a few ‘friends’ from his radio, while on your side there were only your parents and the closest family who could afford the trip to the south.  


At the altar, he stood waiting for his bride with this impossibly smug grin on his face. You were led to him like a sheep for slaughter, in probably literal sense. You prayed that you would trip and break your leg or something, which would allow you to postpone this whole madness but when your father gave your hand to the smiling murderer, you knew it was too late. During your vows he didn’t even stutter, no, he didn’t even blink while you fought for each word leaving your mouth. His gaze was unnerving, staring down in your eyes. You felt as if he threatened you without using words. When everything was done you were allowed to seal your vows with a kiss. Only then did you feel him tense. He kept your hands in death grip and you fought with yourself not to wince. His jaw worked hard for a second before he visibly gritted his teeth and leaned down to you. Unknowingly to you, you behaved in the completely same manner. He placed his lips on yours and didn’t do anything more. Nor you did anything. You stayed like that for a while, no more than a few seconds, but it felt like an eternity. When he leaned back you immediately opened your eyes and let go of the breath encaged in your lungs. His grip lessened a bit and he grinned back as usually at the sound of clapping and voices of congratulations. You also smiled, just to let the play carry on.  


After the ceremony, he held your hand all the time. Everyone, knowing him, deemed the gesture to be sweet, but you knew him even better. Each time your fake smile faltered a little or when your voice trembled, as you once more expressed your ‘true’ feelings toward him, his grip tightened, keeping you in line. You couldn’t believe how much effort he put into making you do something or keeping an eye on you, but soon you realized that he enjoyed your torment. That grin on his face was genuine in the worst possible way.  


….  


You learnt the basic rules of being a wife of a serial killer pretty fast. The weekly routine, the hours he worked, the hours he killed, the time you spend together and the way you spend it together. Mostly you were at home alone. You cleaned the house, cooked and sometimes went out to do basic shopping. Alastor worked since mornings till late afternoon during weekdays, except for weekends when he worked in evenings, hosting a musical broadcast. The times were dire and he liked his job, so extra hours were not a problem to him apparently. His weekday broadcast started at noon and lasted a few hours. He mostly played music, read fragments of novels and presented news. When he came back home you welcomed him with dinner and presented him with a fresh newspaper you collected each morning. In the evening he sat in his armchair reading and looking through the news while you served the tea, cup for him and yourself, and kept him company reading a novel quietly. Sometimes, when he had particularly good mood, he tormented you, asking you question about your thoughts about him as a… hunter. You were interested in the psychology of murderers after all. At one point he asked you to analyze him.  


But what you dreaded the most were times when you both readied yourself to sleep. There were only two possibilities that each night could be spent. Either Alastor was out, doing whatever he did to entertain himself (killing) or he was home, calmly reading voodoo books, you didn’t understand and were petrified of, before heading to sleep. The home itself wasn’t particularly small, having two bedrooms, but one of them was off limits to you:  


_“You are free to go anywhere, this house is yours as well. You can go anywhere but this room… you are never to enter this room… understood?”_  


In the end you shared one room, too small to fit two separate beds. So you shared one as well, as a married couples do. And that stroke the fear to your heart. True to his words he wouldn’t try anything on you. But he declared that a few months prior, and now you were married. Things changed slightly, what if he changed his mind about that too? But you realized soon, that he indeed didn’t plan on anything. He seemed to feel as uncomfortable as you felt. At first you thought he was not interested in you as a woman, but after some time you noted that he didn’t favor men as well. In fact he didn’t favor anyone. _Hopeless romantic, huh…?_  


You, on the other hand, despite admitting that he indeed was handsome and attractive, also didn’t feel any sexual attraction towards him. Moreover, you were glad that the subject of such a nature barely surfaced. Even if your parents stated to pester you again, with the questions about grandkids this time…  


_Platonic._  


That was a right description. You told him once that you were not the biggest fan of a touch. He also displayed his displeasure of being touched by just…anyone. However, he seemed to not really respect your no-touch rule. His hands were all over you, but he never crossed the line of an indecency. You never felt particularly… violated. Over the years he must have learnt your touch as well because, even if you were not often the one initiating anything he didn’t push your hand away when the opportunity presented itself.  


You helped him to tie and wear his bowtie properly and he helped you to comb your hair or zip your clothes. Sometimes. He also liked dancing with you. He had that habit of turning the radio on at random moments and steal you away from whatever you were doing just to threw you from side to side like a ragdoll.  


Your daily routine started to bore you at some point. You tried to reason with Alastor, for him to allow you to go to work, but he refused, claiming that you need to earn more trust form him before he allow you to spend more time outside alone, where involuntary, you could spill too much to his likening. You were a bad liar after all.  


So one day, you cleaned the house once more pacing from one corner to another until the grandfather clock started to bell noon. Absent mindedly you approached the fireplace where there was a radio on the mantel. You flicked it on and it started to screech quietly so your fingers proceeded to tune its signal until it caught the right wave frequency. A familiar voice reached your ears and you shuddered but didn’t proceed to turn off the radio.  


“Hello, my dear listeners…!” his voice was captivating. Even if he spoke through the microphone, the static added more spice to its sound. You liked it, although it pained you. You lost track of time. The broadcast was repetitive during week days and always lasted approximately four hours, so you felt safest person under Sun during that time. You resumed busing yourself with idle cleaning until you stopped in front of certain door.  


You were petrified of what was behind that door. The forbidden room. A torture hall, a body storage? You lived there for a few good months and not even once had a chance to peek inside. But today your curiosity reached its peak. You couldn’t help yourself. Not thinking much you turned the handle looking around once again, in paranoia that he was standing quietly behind you, and finally pushed the door only to see an utterly plain room. You blinked in surprise. It was the completely ordinary bedroom with a neat bed, wardrobe and chest of drawers with a few photographs at the display. You took a few steps inside looking around carefully. You spend there a few minutes at most as you heard a sound of front door being opened. Your heart jumped to your throat.  


But the radio was still on. You could hear the voice of the host still… Oh god, the voice in the radio… was not Alastor’s. The host of the broadcast was someone different, you heard him even admitting to speak on behalf of Alastor. You realized your mistake the moment you started to turn towards exit. And so, he stood there, in the door of the room which should remain closed. And you were standing in the room where under no circumstances you were allowed to be. You were scared, he was livid. His gaze was focused on you but you weren’t sure if he saw you.  


“I cut my own broadcast short just to hurry back home, to my _lovely wife_ , and what do I see? I thought we were clear that you are not allowed to even peek into this room?” he started to approach you, yet your feet were rooted to the floor. For the first time you saw him so serious. No hint of smile on his lips. “If so, then what are you doing here, touching her stuff? Give me one reason.” He put a hand around your neck and squeezed in warning.  


“I….I wanted to meet her.” You blurted in panic and the hand on your neck froze.  


“What?”  


“I wanted to meet your mother. You know my parents while I can only imagine yours. You always mention her, say how wonderful woman she was, I just wanted to see for myself.” At this point his hand went slack and you were free of his clutches so taking a step back you slowly turned on your heel and approached photo frames. You carefully lifted the one presenting a pretty, young woman and a small boy siting on her lap. You could swear you heard a gasp of distress coming from Alastor but you didn’t dare to look him in the eye. Your gaze was glued to the frame.  


“Is it she?” he hesitated but after a while nodded in affirmation. “Is it you?” a second nod. You couldn’t help but wonder what happened to that boy. An innocent boy.  


“Do you think she would like me?” you asked instinctively, despite yourself.  


“Like you? Darling… she would absolutely detest you.”  


“Oh…” you was not sure if the pang you felt was a disappointment but definitely you felt something.  


“I was her only child, she was quite protective of me~…” he took the photo from you with such delicacy as if it was made of paper thin glass. “Let’s put mother back on that spot, shall we?” he set the frame down and turned to you sharply. “Now, as your curiosity is properly sated can you promise me not to come in this room again?”  


“I promise.” He put an arm around your waist and led you outside the room as if to ensure that you would not wander anywhere he didn’t approve of again. As he was closing the door you were patiently waiting for him to resume and head towards kitchen.  


“Alastor…?” he acknowledged you with a hum. “Do you…. detest me?” you shot and his eyes narrowed but his step never faltered. He led you to the kitchen table and pulled a chair for you, ordering you to sit with a movement of a hand. You obliged still waiting for the answer.  


“I am angry with you.” He said honestly. “You betrayed my trust.” He said and you felt guilty. “But I don’t detest you in a long run. If I did, would you be my wife right now? I don’t think so.” He explained not looking at you, instead he started to arrange pots and ingredients. He pulled the apron you sewed some time ago and after a quick examination he put it on.  


“What are you doing?”  


“Cooking the dinner, silly. You were so preoccupied with exploring that you forgot to cook it yourself.” The another jab was direct, slightly sexist but you knew he didn’t mean it that way. You simply failed to fulfil your deal of responsibilities which were crucial for this machine to work.  


“I’m sorry. I mean it. But I just…. couldn’t stop. And when the door went ajar…“  


“Do you listen to my broadcast every day?” you stopped rambling at an unexpected, distracting question “I couldn’t help but to notice that radio was on.” _Ah yes… it was…_  


“Y-yes, I do.” You shamefully admitted. You didn’t want to give him any satisfaction with the fact that he managed to shackle you to him even more.  


“Do you enjoy it? Or rather… You want to be sure when I’m at the studio, am I right?”  


“I betrayed your trust, so…. would you believe me if I tell you that… both are true…?” sighing in defeat you admitted what you didn’t want, in hope of appeasing his crude mood. Which you caused unfortunately.  


“What do you enjoy the most?” he seemed to ignore the second reason why you listen to his broadcast. On the contrary, his usual excitement returned to his voice and you felt a little more at ease.  


“I like…” you hesitated and you could hear as he stopped chopping vegetables so there were no sounds in the kitchen. “your voice… and the way you talk about things, with so much… _life_.” You once more struggled for the right words. “You seem to be very… passionate about what you do.”  


“Oh, but I am! You know it very well!” he exclaimed in shrill tone as usually he did. A good sign.  


“And I think I started to figure you out…” you added and regretted immediately after. You said too much….  


“Oh~?” a teasing and amused demon turned his head to you and eyed your face, the dinner long forgotten.  


“All what you do, you do for attention.” He turned abruptly to you, with a kitchen knife still in hand. His smile was replaced with the slight frown to your alarm.  


“Is this all you managed to ‘figure out’?” he asked with displeasure and disappointment “What did they tell you at that university of yours? “  


“Could you let me finish, please?” you said, sick of his humors. “I could not know the origin of your crimes as there is no visible motive or a scheme behind them. That, I’m afraid, you would have to tell me personally, however, I know that attention seeking plays great role in it. You may not realize that, but you enjoy being the radio host not without reason. More so, your kills are not hidden, you don’t even really try. You want them to find the bodies. You want to share.” His eyes narrowed playfully as the displeasure faded from his expression. “That is a real reason I am here. I am not captivating, interesting or any of those things you claim that made you not to kill me. You need a spectator. Someone who could catch your tiny inside jokes you tell during your broadcasts. The innocent details you weave in during reporting your own crimes. Witnessing mastered, ‘genuine’ worry in your radio voice as you say that yet another victim was found. You know I know you did this. So you keep boasting about it, even if no one apart from me realizes it.” You listed glaring at his feet as his expression lightened with a delight.  


“You noticed my little _episodes of honesty_?! Oh, I knew you would~! Are they too obvious? Too easy to read, we wouldn’t want anybody else to find out, do we?”  


“So I am right then?”  


“Yes and no, sweetheart… It is true that it is nice to have someone sharing your interests… “ _No I don’t share them!_ “You cannot imagine how frustrating it is to do something that brings you joy and pleasure and you cannot tell a soul. Everyone knows about you but no one knows it is indeed YOU!” he exclaimed waving the knife around and your eyes didn’t leave it for a second, which he noticed. He approached you bending down to your level. Only then your eyes left the utensil and locked with his gaze “However you, not being captivating or interesting is untrue… You surprise me every day! Your wits and your mind… your _struggles_ …” you frowned and his grin widened “Oh, how lovely…” he straightened and approached the counter again. “Aren’t you curious why I am back earlier today?”  


“I am, in fact…”  


“I have something planned…” he said ominously and side glanced at you seeking your reaction.  


“I see.” You drawled in exchange trying not to humor him, but you could see that his grin widened once more as he was turning back to resume his cooking.  


Not to your surprise he cooked jambalaya and rambled once more about his mother who gave him this particular receipt. You once more wondered what kind of relationship he shared with his mother but due to your prior situation you didn’t dare to start that discussion. The dinner ended and as you got up to collect the plates and clean them he stopped you and offered to wash them himself.  


“Would you mind changing in something pretty, sweetheart? I would suggest that (F/C) gown. It looks wonderfully on you!~” to say you were surprised was an understatement, but nevertheless, not wanting to upset him even more you nodded and turned towards your room. “Should you make yourself especially pretty, it would be appreciated.” He added with a mischievous glint to his eye what made you stop.  


“Should I be wary?” you questioned, feeling an unpleasant twist in your stomach.  


“Oh, no no no, don’t you worry your pretty head!” he smiled with his lips pursed and you knew he wouldn’t spill anything to you. Your reactions were too funny to him, so you simply left the kitchen.  


You did as he suggested, wore the right gown, applied the right makeup. You looked just right. Lifting up your purse you calculated all possibilities of the evening, and then night and couldn’t help but feel rather nervous to go out with him. At least that was what you though he planned. You tried to calm yourself, just to look natural and headed back to him. He was waiting in the living room, wearing the same shirt and pants, yet he changed his blazer to something less casual and under his armpit there was a top hat.  


“There you are my dearest! Oh my, you look ravishingly beautiful! I claim you are getting even more beautiful with every single day!” he grasped your gloved hands and eyed you from head to toe. A few times. “Do you know what day is today?” he asked and you already knew what he meant.  


It must have been an anniversary of sorts and your mind reeled back trying to recall what event would he want to celebrate. It wasn’t your wedding anniversary for sure, you were living together slightly longer than you were married but was that already a year? Also, would it be even important enough to him to celebrate it anyhow?  


“It’s our first anniversary!” he exclaimed seeing your confusion “I hope you didn’t forget?!”  


“Uh… no, it’s not…? The wedding was…”  


“Ah, of course! The wedding. No no no, today passed the full year since I know you!” he happily exclaimed. “The full year of the purest entertainment you provide me with, every single day! I understand your confusion, usually people keep track of dates that are somehow marked by celebration or some pompous event, however, the day I met you during our exclusive interview was a much more memorable experience to me than that silly ceremony we went through!” he invaded your space bending down. “So I thought that we could spend a pleasant evening together doing things we both could enjoy!~’ he nearly sang and his smile become feral. You gulped.  


“What kind of things could we possibly enjoy together?” asking that, you hoped he didn’t tell you to look pretty so you would look nice in an opened coffin.  


“Ah, for me it is simply every minute spent with you!~ As for you, I’ve noticed you spend awfully distinctive amount of time in the house which, I admit, I may be the cause of…” he drawled in a manner that ought to build up the tension “Sooo, I thought you would enjoy an evening out!” he put his hand in the pocket of his blazer and with a theatrical movement he pulled it out, clutching two pieces of paper. “What about a picture show?! This technology is a novelty and I must admit that I myself am rather curious as of the way it feels to experience it! Aren’t you curious yourself? Would you do me an honor to accompany me?” as usual he blabbered without the end, confusing you even more. But this time you were speechless for completely another reason. He found an excuse to torment you more in completely innovative way, hiding behind a simple courtesy. Moreover, behind the anniversary!  


“Do I have a choice?” your questioned immediately and his smile disappeared as soon as you stopped speaking.  


“Of course you do.” He said seriously but this time you didn’t feel threatened. You frowned glaring at the tickets he held in his outstretched hand. His deflated expression made you feel horrible. He really tried, even if in reality he didn’t really have to… Moreover, you were ready to go out, it would be a shame to waste all this efforts.  


“Then… it would be my pleasure to accompany you to picture show…” you said timidly and he beamed with childish joy. His authentic reaction brought an involuntary smile on your lips. The one you couldn’t fight off fast enough for him to notice.  


“Oh?~What do I see? Did I manage to get my wonderful wife to smile? You should smile more often, darling, it really suits you!” he hid the tickets back to his pocked and stood next to you offering you his arm. “Shall we, my lady?” he asked with kind smile that managed to fool you once in the past.  


“Yes, we shall.” You hooked your own arm with his and you both walked out the house, into the slowly falling night.  


….  


Everything lasted longer than you predicted. The fake marriage, the serial murders. Until one fateful night of 1933. He came back from the hunt covered in blood. You tried not to pay any mind to it as it was definitely not the first time. But what you couldn’t ignore was the fact, that this time the blood was entirely his. His clothes were tattered, skin shattered and after cleaning his wounds to the best of your abilities you noticed teeth marks. Later, he explained that he encountered rather angered dogs which belonged to his last victim. The dogs didn’t manage to save their owner but definitely tried to avenge him.  


To your own displeasure you stayed by his side for all those days he was chained to a bed. You called in to the radio station informing everyone that Alastor was ill enough, not to be able to work for a few days and tended to his wounds at home. You even opted for sleeping on the couch just to not aggravate them accidentally in your sleep. You wanted to give him space, and apparently you needed that too. To your great worry, he wasn’t getting any better. Even if the wounds started to close after a few days, his fever didn’t leave him, his muscles were tensed and spasmed from time to time, without his control.  


You knew something was very bad when he started to hear voices and see things that weren’t there. You tried to blame it on his ridiculous voodoo practice, even threw out all objects associated with it, so they wouldn’t influence him even more. But it was all futile. Moreover, he refused to drink. His whole body refused to do so. The room he was in had to be dark, otherwise he complained, positively scaring you more. You wanted to call a doctor but he refused strictly. One day he himself confirmed what you were fearing for quite some time. He had quite specific symptoms you couldn’t mistake with anything else.  


During the moment of a betterment, he got up and headed to the living room. You tried to stop him, but he didn’t let you touch him. He took the rifle from the wall, where it was displayed and surprisingly never used, checked if it was loaded and sat in his armchair. Only then he called you over. You hesitated seeing him fully armed but noticing his oddly pleading expression you obliged.  


“Darling…. I will lose my bearings soon….” He started giving you the gun.  


“You already did…” you whispered meaning all murders he committed but you froze when he eyed you with the expression that screamed at you _‘you know what to do’_ “I…. I can’t!” you screamed and he winced in discomfort “You are good at it, just… just kill yourself!” you tried to push the rifle to his hands but he refused to take it from you.  


“Oh, don’t be silly my dear! The suicide is a sin!” he smiled weakly joking around as if he believed in the afterlife. During your time together, even if he expressed his interest in dark magic, cults and supernatural, he never admitted he acknowledged Heaven or Hell, he even mocked you when you admitted that you wished to go to Heaven as a good people do. Because you believed, at least tried to.  


“Come on now, it’s really easy... “ he readjusted the rifle putting it to his forehead and grinned at you, peeking from under his lashes “…pull the trigger and it's done!” you started to hyperventilate at that point, your hands twitched and Alastor’s grin widened forcefully. “Oh, but think of everything I’ve done to you, ha ha ha! All those years you needed to lie for me! Wash my bloodied clothes! Couldn’t sleep peacefully! Oh how thriving it was!” he frowned at your lack of reaction. “Or maybe I should take you with me as my final prey, hmm?” his smile straightened into thin line and you were brought to the earth. He got up from his armchair and started to stalk towards you. You lowered the gun in the process taking a few steps back. “Should I bite you like that feral dogs did to me and transfer this hellish illness to you just to give you a taste? Or should I kill you as I initially intended and then die by your side watching your corpse to bleed out slowly? Wouldn’t that be romantic?” at that your hands started to tremble and the riffle stated to rattle quietly.  


“I just cannot kill, Al…” you started to cry. “I’m sorry…” you sobbed and despite his delirious state his expression softened slightly.  


“Won’t you show me a mercy, darling, save from a painful death now?” he tried a different approach his forehead sweaty and the eyes were losing their focus. “There is not much time left…”  


“A… mercy…?”  


“Yes, yes a mercy. It would be a good deed on your part now wouldn’t it be?” he backed off with a reassuring smile, slowly descending back on the armchair seat. “Because you are a good person, Y/N, you can do a good deed!~”  


“Will it hurt you?”  


“No more than the rabies does, my dear…” he rasped. “given you hit the mark seamlessly…” You wished he didn’t say that. Your panic renewed but you didn’t hyperventilate anymore. The rifle felt so unfamiliar in your arms, you weren’t sure how to hold it properly. It was also heavier than you suspected so you set your legs slightly apart, stationing yourself.  


“It was a pleasure to meet you, quite a pleasure…” he murmured looking at you but you didn’t reply anything, looking down at him you only nodded your head in a courtesy and drowning in tears you pulled the trigger.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: By accident I met the theory that Alastor got attacked by the dog (or group of them), got rabies in the process and finally got shot straight between his eyes (x mark on the forehead). For me, this theory is very plausible as taking into a consideration the timeline of his human life. There was no cure so being spared by mercy kill was the only way. Also he is quite ashamed of the way he died, so I do believe this kind of ‘prosaic’ death would suit his description of pathetic way of kicking the bucket.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y/N - your name

The moment that the smoke dissipated the front door burst open and two coppers ran into the house. You turned around abruptly, an expression fearful and shocked at once. Like a deer in the headlights you froze and both men did the same. They assessed the situation quickly: you standing with a still steaming rifle in hand, behind you a body of your husband, sprawled in an armchair with a hole in the head, almost unrecognizable due to close proximity of the shot. And blood, blood everywhere. The walls painted red, drops falling slowly on the ground, carpet was so over flooded that each step was squishy.  


“I…” you tried but at that point any shock was gone and the coppers started to act upon their procedures.  


“Put the gun down. NOW!” one of the men ordered while the other started to pull his own gun out, but as on the instinct, you readied yourself to shot the second, last shot. You fired immediately, without much of targeting and the bullet managed to reach the policeman with the gun. It hit his leg and he immediately let go of his own weapon only to fall down, screaming in pain. The second man fall down on the ground as well, seeing you firing, and was attempting to get up slowly realizing you have no more bullets. That was your the only chance. Not thinking much more, you fled between them, kicking uninjured man in the head in the process, to actively slow him down. You ran, passing them both and running straight towards the swamps. The only thought that played on repeat in your mind was: to escape. You didn’t know how the police found out so quickly but you cursed your luck. Couldn’t they find the culprit while Alastor was still alive? How did they even find out? You didn’t know but sometime later you heard a rumor that they found the last victim of Alastor, and due to his accident with dogs he was clumsy enough to lose his pocket watch. They asked around and managed to locate the owner. But really, they came at the worst time. Seeing you killing him, there wouldn’t even be much of a questioning. The watch was his, but he was dead and you were the one who killed him. You could also tried to frame him, didn’t you?  


Your family couldn’t believe what happened to their daughter. How it was even possible for you to be associated with, and suspected of, serial killings. They refused to believe everything until it was revealed that you were caught red handed just after murdering our own husband with a shot between his eyes. Everyone cried after a popular radio host, memorizing his outgoing and cheerful personality, his never ending smile. You on the other hand became a public enemy no.1. There was even a bounty placed on your head. Everyone suddenly recollected your work on serial killers, psychology and immediately pinned the MURDERER to your name. You were finished in America so you turned to the last resort you could.  


Travel across the ocean was a mundane task. It lasted days and your growing uneasiness was only exaggerated by the lack of security. You were all alone, accused of serial murders in your home place, because of your late husband who forced you to remain by his side from the start. None of this was your fault. It was his and his alone. You were a good person, scared and pushed to extremes because of fear but you’ve never wanted any of this. He forced you and then… left for the hungry wolves.  


You stayed in London for some time trying to find a job as anyone really, within reason of course, never falling to low your own personal standards. You needed money. Without your official documents proving your qualifications you were refused a work in your actual field of expertise, also the fact that you were a woman didn’t help you in the slightest. In the end you worked in public library, reading various books, trying to divert your mind from your stormy past. But the feeling of guilt never left you . You’ve seen death, you caused one. You couldn’t sleep, you couldn’t really bond with anyone in your new territory because deep down you were still afraid that someone could find out of your past and snitch at you. Your aversion to touch only grew in force, however, you felt lonely. 

You lacked the closure, you wished to confine in anybody, maybe feel some warmth of the other human being, not necessarily in an intimate way. And moreover you had this paranoia of yours that he was still watching you, listening to you, controlling in some way.  


Then, the war came.  


You stayed in Europe of course, the idea of the another escape didn’t cross your mind even once. Instead you found a great opportunity to redeem yourself. While men were sent to fight actively, women stayed home keeping them safe, but some braver or more crazy ones recruited themselves as a medical help. You were no different. You wanted to help people in need, to be a good person as you always were. You wanted to prove that to god and yourself that there was no bad bone in your being. That none of the mishaps of your past was your fault. So you took a quickened course of first aid where you learned how to help wounded soldiers and after less than a year of intensive training you were finally able to fight your own war.  


You were placed in a medical tent, somewhere behind the frontal fights. Far enough not to be directly endangered, but close enough to still get a fresh and never-ending flow of injured and wounded men. At first you were a simple nurse, helping fully fledged doctors and medics, but as the fights escalated and more wounded soldiers were in need of medical attention you found yourself promoted higher in hierarchy and being transmitted quite often. At some point, after two years of dutiful service, you were placed in charge of medical stuff that was less experienced than you were. That also gave you unlimited the access to the medication.  


You saved countless amount of poor soldiers who were unlucky enough to need your attention as a professional. From time to time there were hopeless cases, far beyond any human abilities. You needed to deal with them as well, witnessing even more death in your life. However, there were also cases in between, that you personally labelled as a ‘special’.  


….  


Your mind zoned out, eyes unblinkingly staring at a heaving man on the stretchers. He didn’t have a leg and half of his stomach was so heavily stained with blood that you could imagine what kind of massacre was beneath the torn cloth of his uniform. The blood didn’t faze you, oh no, living with Alastor you’ve seen just enough of it to get accustomed to gore worse than that. Something more captivating was overwhelming your thoughts. The echo of the certain sentence that your late husband told you before his personal demise rang in your head.  


You was in charge of the medical staff. This tent was your kingdom. You could work on your own. _You could decide of life and death._ And that man, he fought bravely. He sacrificed his life for world to become a better place, he was a good man. A good man in unbearable pain. He lost a limb, that could never be returned, and who knows how much his organs were destroyed. He was and probably will be in lots of pain for the rest of his life. Wouldn’t it be merciful to let him go? The mercy… showing it was a good deed. It would be better for him not to feel any pain anymore, he deserved that.  


You approached a cabinet with the medication. Opening it hastily, you reached for a bottle of clear liquid and a syringe. With well-practiced movements you filled the syringe and approached the man, delirious from the pain and shock he was through.  


“It will be over very soon.” You murmured trying to appease the man. While doing so you checked the needle and disinfected the area where there you were to made an injection. When the needle pierced the skin the man didn’t even twitch, not feeling any more pain beyond he was experiencing already. You pushed the whole contains of the syringe into his system and the effect was almost immediate. The breath of the man got heavier but faster and his muscles started to spasm. He started to choke on the air while you threw the empty bottle and syringe away. Other nurses hearing commotion gathered close to the patient but seeing what was taking place they only frowned and looked at you, their superior. You only shook your head with saddened expression and they understood well the meaning. Many men died during the war.  


As the nurses left to help other patients you approached yours and wiped his forehead with a wet cloth, removing sweat and blood. When his body relaxed, you smiled upon hearing no more pained grunts and breaths. You felt relieved and happy to show mercy to anyone in such _merciless_ world. You were a good person after all. Good deeds made you happy.  


….  


It was 1943. You were relocated once more as the fights started to get more frequent and vicious. You were given the opportunity to help even more soldiers, but also, being merciful towards much wider group of your patients. The circumstances forced you to do this, but you were happy doing favors, so it was alright for you. As you were in charge of getting supplies no one really noticed the increased usage of morphine so no one really complained about it.  


One day you were attending to your patients while the sounds of fight accompanied you in the background. It was nothing new, shots, explosions, distressed and pained shouts in the distance, all of it was your reality for a past few years. However, at one point you heard engines of aero planes and it made you slightly worried. The other war sounds gradually quieted and you focused on your job once again, filling another syringe with the medicine. The distressed shouts from outside increased and the sounds of explosions followed. You froze, the syringe in a hand, realizing that you heard a distinctive whistle of a missile, getting louder and louder.  


“Oh, shit.” You said looking up towards the ceiling of the tent. A moment later you heard the deafening explosion, the ground shook, everything in the tent started to fly around, and you felt the forceful tug followed by unbearably hot temperature. After that, you couldn’t recall anything.  


…  


You woke up with a start. Your hands travelled up to your chest and neck, probing and checking your skin. You felt your medical uniform, all tattered and torn in many places, leaving it almost indecent. You looked hastily at your body, legs, arms, hands … and faltered.  


"What happened to my hands?!" You had four fingers at each palm and they were adorned with claws, authentic claws attached to your body. You also tried to ignore the fact that your skin was pitch black. Was that bomb a nuclear one? You heard that they were used more and more commonly. Was it some kind of weird mutation your body underwent? But why nothing really hurt you? You stood up hastily and looked around. You were in.. park? There were dried trees and even some pond that would be a pleasant sight if not for its murky water. Was it even a water at all? You were also surrounded by people laying around you, like a halo, all in military uniforms. You recognized some faces of medics and even some patients. They looked all the same… until they woke up. A groans drew your attention only for you to witness some… transformation. The man, who looked fairly normal, opened his eyes and his body changed its shape into something more animalistic. You screamed in panic what prompted more awakenings and transformations around you. Soon there were no humans surrounding you, only creatures… demons. Demons who were as confused as you were.  


_Am I dead? Yeah, I must be… That explosion couldn’t leave anything behind after all. Is it some kind of hell?_  


“E-exterminator!” you heard a scream from afar. You turned towards the voice only to see a group of unfamiliar demons pointing fingers at you with fearful expressions. You looked around again making sure they meant you. “But it’s too early! There is still more than a week till the next extermination!” _The extermination?_  


“Uh… excuse me?” you asked and they froze looking at you in disbelief. You gulped nervously seeing that their attention was on you. “Could you by any chance know where we are?” you asked politely and they watched you in disbelief for a few seconds before all of them started to snicker and then laugh.  


“Ah HA HA HA! What is that?! Some kind of a joke?” all of them heaved in amusement, their fear long forgotten. “Is it really one of those angelic twats?!” Angelic what? “Nah, but now I think about it, she doesn’t even look threatening! Like a lost puppy! Ah HA HA HA, oi, lass! You wanna fuck?”  


_You wanna…. What?!_  


“Um… what did you just ask me?” you didn’t believe you heard him right. You were in a plain sight, during the day, you guessed but the sky was red and… was that a pentagram above the city? Even if his question caused a wave of disgust run through you, you still believed you misheard him.  


“Ah HA HA HA, look at that! Listen babe, you are in Hell alright, you seem to be new here so I will nicely explain the rules to you. You always listen to what your superiors tell you. We are longer here so we are your superiors. And we wanna have sum’ good time!” you look around to see other demons walking casually not paying any attention to the harassment which you just experienced. The others that came with you were as confused as you were although they didn’t react in any way as well.  


“Come on, I won’t repeat!” one of them said and the whole group started to stalk towards you. All in plain sight, yet still no one reacted.  


“Stay away!” you warned and they laughed mockingly not stopping in their tracks. The other freshmen started to back off sensing troubles, leaving you behind with those men. Your fear started to surface and you felt something moved behind you. “I said stay AWAY!” this time you yelled and observed as the faces of your abusers paled slightly just before they were pushed back by a strong gust of wind out of nowhere. Seeing them, laying on the ground a few meters away, and other spectators, who observed you with clearly fearful expressions, you turned on your heels and started to run as fast as you could. Soon you noticed that the task wasn’t as easy as you remembered it to be, as something was visibly slowing you down. However, hearing shouts and curses, you didn’t dare to look behind you.  


You ran till you were able to catch your breath in some run down district. You hid in the sketchy alley and after making sure that no one there was after you, you calmed down slightly. In fact, they were more petrified of you than anything and even if it worked for your advantage, it bugged you. So the first opportunity you had, you looked into your reflection in the one of the shattered windows.  


You froze midstep trying to figure out if the creature you saw was indeed you. Your skin was pitch black, as you already noticed, apart from your face which was deathly pale. Your head, although still looking fairly like yours, was more triangular and adorned with impressive pair of horns, curved back. Your hair was also nowhere to be seen, as if you wore some kind of a helmet. You weren’t sure. Your eyes were bigger and the pupils were cat like slits. Also they were reversely black and white. Your sclera was black! And your lips. Your lips didn’t look any different from what you had as a human, apart from the fact they allowed you so smile wider. And your smile… You didn’t feel like smiling at all, yet with your tongue you felt a distinctive change to your teeth so you bared them. And those were not teeth you remembered to have, those were shark like fangs!  


Your clawed, four fingered hand traveled up hiding your lips as you took a few steps back gasping in fear and shock. Your eyes didn’t leave the reflection and, not watching your step, you tripped and started to fall down until something pulled you up instinctively. In growing disbelief you observed as two black and white wings flapped behind you, not allowing your back to touch the ground. They must have saved you dignity or even life back then. That is why you felt so tired after running.  


You couldn’t help but stare at yourself and wonder that you looked like some mockery of an angel. Apart from the lack of a halo and those hellish horns of course, you looked like one, only to be more a caricature of the real thing. You couldn’t stop tears that were freely falling down your face. You felt as if the whole thing was some horrible, surreal dream. And first and foremost you were petrified. Because if the demons existed, angels did too, right? And angels were natural enemies to demons.  


An exterminator. They called you that. But what did that even mean? Were demons afraid of angels and they called them that outrageous name? Or did that term hold a deeper meaning? As you walked down one alley, trying to get to know your surroundings, you came upon posters and warnings on the walls.  


_“Don’t let them exterminate you!”_  


_“Don’t be erased!”_  


_“Beware of the Radio Demon!”_  


“The Radio demon?” you stopped to look carefully at the posters. One of them was oddly specific. As the whole extermination sounded scary enough, that one was especially unnerving. This guy must have been especially strong and dangerous if he possessed his own posters. Moreover, the longer you have been there, the more warnings and words about him you encountered. Then you started to think that this was HELL, of course that there would be demons stronger than the rest and that Radio Demon must have been one of them. You scoffed at the name. The Radio. Of course, it haunted you even after your death.  


The week passed. Or more, you weren’t sure. The each day and night was a pure survival so counting them was the last thing you had on your mind. You explored your new home, sometimes giving in to despair, crying somewhere in the corner, only to be either laughed at or shushed away. Soon you learnt not to show your emotions around here. You went farther into the unpleasant and rundown neighborhood, but probably the whole Hell looked like this, so the worse condition of the buildings and less amount of inhabitants didn’t deter your ‘enthusiasm’. You wanted to know better your new reality.  


You entered one alley just to stop in your tracks at the sight of mutilated bodies of demons scattered around. Surprisingly you didn’t feel nauseous as you predicted. It seemed that war taught you well. The demons were grunting or howling in pain, but seemed mostly alive. Can you even die second time?  


“What had happened?” you asked no one in particular but a slight movement by the wall drew your attention. It was a small cyclops demon who tried to crawl away from its own blood puddle.  


“R-radio..d-….” He fell down unconscious and you gulped in disbelief. Just your luck. The Radio Demon. If he did things like that no wonder others feared him. You turned on your heel ready to flee, unnoticed and far away, until you heard a voice from the distance.  


“HA HA HA, ladies and gentlemen!” That voice. That static, radio voice. You knew it well. You dreamt of it and heard it each time you closed your eyes. It was the second worst sound in your life, just next to gunshots, explosions and other war sounds. Second, only because you knew that the source of it was long dead. But again, was it? You were in Hell, obviously.  


“As your radio host I took it upon myself to present you once again the entertainment of utmost quality! The firsthand sounds of DEATH AND DESPAIR!” the voice continued rambling on and on, making an introduction of some kind of a morbid radio broadcast that apparently repeated itself regularly for several years now.  


You stood behind some abandoned building now, closer to the source of your nightmares, in hiding observing the scene before you. Despite the initial escape plan, the voice kept you attached, drawing you like the moth to the light. High in the sky there was something, big and menacing. The presence caused a goosebumps on your skin even though you knew it was impossible as you were dead already. The creature was… vast, its cloak seemed to cover whole area like a circus tent. It had a face or rather something that looked like face with two round, inhuman eyes and wide, grotesque grin. As soon as the introduction ended it spread its talons and all demons in the area started to spree in panic. A carnage began.  


You needed to breath, you reminded yourself. The images of massacre brought back bad memories from war front. Soldiers who were brought to your medical tent, mutilated men, dying men. The screams were just too much, just too much to contain you own. And so you screamed along others. Your body crumbled, sliding down the wall. Your hands tried to block all sounds clutching tightly the spots where you thought your ears were, but that damned radio sound couldn’t be pushed away. It never could.  


Soon the silence came. Some occasional groans of pain were heard around the area but apart from them and a wind howling somewhere in the distance, there was no sound. You relished in that, until that voice resumed that sickly cheerful broadcast.  


“My _deer_ listeners, treat this performance as a slight warm up before-…”  


“You.” You said steadily and loud and the monster paused, turning to you. It reminded you of the deer but it's antlers were out of proportion, unnaturally big, spreading in the air like roots do in the ground. The features of the creature were sharp and its expression far from any human. “It is all your fault.” You lifted yourself and took step after step, diminishing the distance between you and the demon who seemed to be taken aback by your boldness.  


“Well, hello my darling, you seem to be unaware of who I am it seems!” it said cheerfully but its mouth was unmoving showing a row of sharp and yellow teeth “An exterminator?! Oh how delightful! Yet too early for you to be here, am I right? No matter, it’s quite rude to interrupt a host during a live radio broadcast! But fret you not! I can make you useful no matter what~! I still believe in an old, good way of giving example by- …”  


“I know it’s you, Alastor!” you exclaimed over the radio sounds interrupting him once more and the world froze. The deer-like wendigo tiled its head in question and even if it's maniac expression never left its face, its whole presence seemed to…deflate. It transformed into a man… no, a humanoid demon, clad in red, standing proudly, assessing you carefully.  


“Y/N?” he asked after a few good seconds of contemplation. He seemed honestly surprised to see you there. You eyed him from head to toes. He looked differently than you remembered him but comparing to the turmoil caused by his actions, his altered looks played a minor role in your mind right now..  


“So you still remember me, huh?”  


“What a pleasant surprise! HA HA HA! Who would ever say that - …” you grabbed him by a collar of the shirt and brought his face closer  


“It is all your fault.” You forced out. “It is because of you I am here!”  


“I reckon then that you are aware of where you are now. Well, you are in HELL, my darling~! And in what appealing form I might add! _Beautiful angel of mercy!_ ” he eyed you up and down assessing your demon appearance.  


“You even have the audacity to say it to my face?!” you screeched and felt something twisted behind your back, and you were sure that they weren’t you wings, but you didn’t dare to look away from those glistering red eyes you your tyrant.  


“Oh, but that won’t do at all! You successfully spoil my reputation now.” He complained, however, that horrible grin never left his face. He snapped his fingers and a microphone appeared in his hand 

“Shall we go to a place that would provide us more privacy, hmm?”  


“I’m not going anywhere with you!” You clearly remembered how badly it ended last time.  


“Oh, but I insist…” at that point a loud sound of a siren started to sound around from literally everywhere. You covered looking nervously to the sky looking for any bombing planes that usually came after signals like that. But there was no sound of engines that you knew so well. Instead the red sky started to fill up with black winged creatures which your mind couldn’t recognize. “It would be favorable for us to head to a shelter right now, darling.” he didn’t wait for your reply, instead he linked his arm with your, as if he escorted you home, and in a blink of an eye you were in completely different place, high above the city. You noticed steel construction below your feet and high above your head. A radio tower. As some poor joke pulled on you.  


Just as you leaned out to see more of what was happening in the city, a spear flied right in front of your face, inches form your nose, piercing a metal pier as if it was made of butter. You exhaled and realized that your head would be impaled on that weapon if not for the hand on your shoulder that pulled you back just in time. The creature that threw the spear at you seemed to observe you for some time but then swiftly turned and left you alone.  


“That would be a quick demise, you should be more attentive my darling!~” Alastor exclaimed with a wide grin that to closer inspection was far from pleasant. His voice actually reminded you that you were not alone on that damned tower. Yet, you averted your gaze back to the flying creatures trying to decode their origin.  


“Those are…. Angels?” you asked in disbelief.  


“Oh, but of course my dear, they have wings and halos. Of course they are angels! We call them exterminators here!” he shook his head with closed eyes, his grin got smaller transforming into amused smirk as if lack of that knowledge was incredibly amusing to him. You on the other hand were not amused at all. For a single moment you felt nothing but a pure surprise. Then something ugly started to form in your mind.  


Those were angels? The creatures that you strived to become after your death? The good beings? You wasted ten years of pursuit of redemption, only to be placed in hell after all your attempts? Moreover those angels you prayed to so strongly, came down here just to kill all life within sight, almost killing you, not sparing a second for hearing your justification. That was “being good” what everyone told you about? You reached for the spear that was still stuck in the pier and with ease you pulled it out. You felt your body twisting and changing somehow. It felt oddly natural and you seemed to know perfectly what you were doing. Alastor on the other hand, wasn’t so sure.  


“Darling?” he asked in confusion but before his hand managed to grab your shoulder again you were gone, high in the air, your wings spread proudly to impressive size. To his surprise you were heading straight for one of the angels, the very same that tried to pierce your head with that spear.  


It also noticed you approaching and pulled another weapon, also speeding down in your direction. You crossed your arms and upon reaching your target you uncrossed them in one swift movement, right hand pushing the spear into side of angel’s head, left one slicing its neck with your now sharp talons. You did it so fast that the creature didn’t have time for a reaction, its body started to fall immediately down as you stayed in the air with your wings and arms spread with expression of a pure fury.  


After a while you felt something circling your waist and it broke you out of the trance. You looked down in panic upon noticing black tendrils that were slowly tightening around you. You let out a strangled whine as it started to pull you down toward the radio tower. You expected a painful impact but instead it let you go carefully, placing you in your initial spot. Yours eyes widened seeing that in truth that creature was Alastor.  


“You should be much more careful around here, my dear wife. The stunt you pulled could cost you a plenty… Yet….” His eyes glistened. “W-would you mind an interview my dear?!~” he seemed veeery excited. Exited enough to bounce and stutter. His cheeks were rosy and you swore you’d never seen him like that, demon or human alike. And it alarmed you greatly.  


“What? Why?” you hissed and your fists clenched even more than they were already.  


“After all you killed one of the exterminators just NOW!~” he screamed in delight and you noticed that in one of your hands there still was a spear with a horned head attached to it. You screamed in panic and threw the spear away .”It was so entertaining but also incredibly exciting!” he kept on rambling. “Seeing you like that, overwhelmed in a pure rage, in this mocking form of an angel yourself! Oh how fitting! Angel killing one of their own! Oh how exhilarating!” he clasped his gloved hands “The mass must know who just manifested in HELL, my Darling, I didn’t know you have that in you!” at that point your back was glued to one of the tower piers and you were hyperventilating heavily with bloodied hand that a few minutes earlier cut someone’s head off, balled in tight fist, pressed to your chest.  


“Now, my dear are you quite alright?” he seemed to express some kind of concern towards your distressed state.  


“I… I … killed… t-this!” you pointed the head pierced by the spear, all your doing.  


“Oh, and in what style! An one slash, an utter spectacle!” he reached out for your bloodied hand and pulled it to his lips placing a courteous kiss to your knuckles, then straightening himself he licked his lips. “You must tell me everything! How you possessed this kind of fascinating amount of rage and pure, raw power! An exclusive interview, just for my broadcast on going!” he straightened and pulled you farther towards himself, embracing you in a pose for a dance.  


“Y-you broadcast this…. massacre?” you gulped feeling utterly disgusted by the mere idea.  


“But of course I DO! I want to share this purest form of entertainment around in Hell. Each year there is only one day, a full 24 hours of delight! But over the decade I admit it started to wear at the seams a bit. But YOU, oh you are the remedy! A novelty!” you heard a radio song in the background and he spun you around so you ended up balancing on the edge, your back turned towards the exterminations happening in the distance.  


“What is done cannot be undone, my dear…. “ he said quieter staring straight to your eyes as he pulled you back towards himself. “You are in Hell now, there is no place for guilt.” He cooed and his clawed thumb wiped your tears that you never felt to be there in the first place.  


“I did nothing to deserve this…”  


“Oh, but one bullet is all it takes, darling…” he said knowingly and your bloodshot, black eyes widened at him. “Oh what kind of eternity would that be without my precious wife at my side?” _No._ He couldn’t plot it all, he didn’t believe in Hell and Heaven in the first place, also he obviously wouldn’t know if afterlife even existed.  


As if sensing your distress caused by that simple realization he cupped our cheeks and said “As the one closes to their ultimate demise, they start to wonder! So treat that as a simple precaution steps. And look where that shot of yours brought us both! It was the fate!” at that point you were glaring ahead far beyond his delighted face, ready to strangle anything that was in your reach.  


“Perhaps some familiarity would ease you mind? I understand that the first baby steps in hell are _hell of a distress! _” he snapped his fingers and you were sitting on the couch of your house. Everything was the same as you remember it. Sofa, armchair, grandfathers clock, the fireplace and that damned radio on the mantel. You focused your eyes on it only to notice as it came to life on its own and tuned itself, only to play a familiar intro of a song you utterly hated.  
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“Let’s play our song darling! It reminded me of you for the past decade!~” he admitted and you frown deepened. Were there even moments like that? Did he really think of you? He approached you and two swift strides and with tug brought you back to your feet. Before you managed to blink he swirled you to a happy dance. You couldn’t believe of what were you doing. Dancing to the song that you were sure took its origin in Hell indeed, while behind the windows you could hear the screams and sounds of carnage going on.  


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“Smile! You are never fully dressed without a smile!” he exclaimed and pulled you so close that there was no space between your bodies. You truly couldn’t recall a single time you were so physically close to each other back then, when you were both alive. You rested your forehead on his shoulder tiredly, and also to your surprise, you didn’t feel him even flinch. As the song escalated your movements slowed instead, swaying from side to side and felt a rumble coming from his chest. As you lifted your head to look at his face, you noticed him looking into distance, lips moved along the lyrics. Deep in thought, even his grin was smaller.  


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“Alastor…”  


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“Oh my dear, you brought to my mind a very important matter to take care of!” he snapped out of his thoughts and pushed you away from his body, full grin back in place “Your real name should stay in confines of our enclosed household. Now you are in a place where there the biggest game in history of the universe is taking place! You need a stage name fit for your achievements!”  


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“Says ‘the Radio Demon’.” you muttered at him and he clearly showed that he was pleased with your familiarity to his title.  


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“Oh, I was not the one that chose it for myself however you must admit that its incredibly fitting, ha ha ha! No, no, no my name was chosen for me by my loyal listeners, however, you always were a shy creature so I don’t see you walking on the stage and presenting the fullest of your abilities with that adorning smile of yours, you are yet to give me… No, you would be just that small, timid…’  


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“Maybe you don’t know me all that much anymore….” Ten years, ten years of freedom you had, you managed to change, to spread your wings, taste independency. Be yourself.  


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“Darling, as much as I was positively surprised by your display outside, I pledge that you still remain yourself. That wonderfully self-conscious and quiet as mouse gal I could fall for!” he announced squeezing your cheek between his fingers. “So I also believe that others would not take it upon themselves to grace you with the fitting name!“ he lamented but immediately a lightbulb lightened over his head ”Oh, that’s the idea! Grace! This would fit. Or no, Mercy, yes this is! As you are _merciful_ , aren’t you?” your claws dig into his shoulders at what he tensed slightly but never ceased dancing. Yes, you were. Helping others supposed to be a good deed. And for good deeds one doesn’t go to hell. And being in arms of that monster for the rest of your eternity was a pure definition of Hell! But he was right in one matter. There was nothing that could be done to undo anything. You were doomed, so as much as you wanted to let the despair swallow you whole, you knew that it would change nothing more than adding to your gloom. You could also play along and cause a hell yourself.  


____

“Emsel.” You said after a while of useless ramble of the radio demon, who still kept suggesting new names for you.  


____

“Huh?” he lifted his brow and his smile faltered completely in surprise at your tone.  


____

“It will be fitting name. Believe me.” You tried not to look up immediately. “Maybe I will explain one day.” You added sensing his confusion.  


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“I don’t see the appeal I must admit. But the demon name should not be appealing at all! It should strike a fear into others hearts….” He became very creepy over a second and it was your turn to tense. “So… _Emsel it is _… very well.” He snapped his fingers and you found yourself in a very familiar radio studio. The retro appearance of the interior and microphones brought unwanted memories to your mind. Again everything was just as you remembered.  
__

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“Well, isn’t it a little nostalgic?” the radio demon asked with amused smile and tiled his head to the side eyeing you carefully. Only then did you notice that you were no longer wearing your torn medical uniform. No, you were wearing the very same, simple dress as you did the day you first met him, during your first radio interview 15 years ago. The one that was destroyed day after when you witnessed your first murder.  


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Then you remembered how memorable that day was to him. Then you realized, since you were married, there was no one in your life apart from him. And the reason you were devastated after he was gone wasn’t the guilt you felt for his victims. Not entirely at least. You missed him. You missed the emotions he woke up within you. You understood how broken you truly were, there was never a single chance that you would end up in Heaven. Even if you wasted your efforts, wasted years telling yourself you were ‘good’, you were not sure if being in Heaven would make you any happier than you already were. He wouldn’t be there. You would be alone all along. You didn’t want to be alone anymore.  


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“Now! Wont you introduce yourself to other residents of Hell, the loyal listeners to my annual extermination broadcast?” he asked in his showman voice, the sentence itself twisted and adjusted to your new reality, but still the same as you remembered. Once again, he surprised you with the detail and effort he put into literally everything concerning you. Two could play this game.  


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“Oh, I’m sorry…I am not entirely sure what to say. I guess, I’m just merely nervous…” you quoted yourself at what the grin of your host widened.  


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“Don’t you worry darling, imagine there is only the two of us in here~!” he sang teasingly and reminded you how responsive to his antics you were.  


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“Oh, that I will.” You said and smiled at him for the first time, proudly showing off your new set of teeth “I wouldn’t have it any other way… _darling_ …”

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**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: According to dictionary pf slang:  
> emsel n. [medical M.sel, morphine]; (US drugs) morphine.
> 
> As much as reader’s mentality is concerned, she could develop some of the characteristics of Stockholm syndrome and later on, PTSD due to war experiences. As her freedom was taken away from her for years, when the abuser disappeared she felt finally in control even if in the beginning she felt lost and scared without him. That excess of freedom and feeling of power was so overwhelming that she descended into her own little madness. Deep down she knew she was a plain murderer but smothered her conscience with false assurances like being merciful to people in need. At least I understand it as such :D
> 
> If the reader presented in this story had a music theme I would suggest this wonderful piece:
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JRw-8tDiPQc
> 
> I believe it would fit her very well especially in the later parts.  
> I obviously don’t own any character of Hazbin Hotel, they belong to Vivziepop.  
> I also don’t own any rights to song that was performed by OR3O

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: I hope you enjoyed and please don't kill me for possible mistakes I really tried to double check it :)


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